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[imaginationswoes]

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Airy Miller ▼   X

Airy Miller: Dear phone, this is super lame but I have no where else private to write. ANYWAY, I met two guys today. We'll call them T and N. I know that's stupid but talking to myself via text isn't much better. Airy Miller: Dear phone, this is super lame but I have no where else private to write. ANYWAY, I met two guys today. We'll call them T and N. I know that's stupid but talking to myself via text isn't much better. Airy Miller: I don't know what I'm doing but I'm staying with them... Airy Miller: I don't know what I'm doing but I'm staying with them... Airy Miller: T is nice and he answers all my stupid questions but he's only awake at night. Airy Miller: T is nice and he answers all my stupid questions but he's only awake at night. Airy Miller: N... is really confusing me. It's a shame guys like that don't fall for girls like me. Airy Miller: N... is really confusing me. It's a shame guys like that don't fall for girls like me. Airy Miller: This is stupid I'm going to stop now. More so since T let me on his phone plan so I have the internet again. Airy Miller: This is stupid I'm going to stop now. More so since T let me on his phone plan so I have the internet again.

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Audio | April 17th

[riotousjunkie]

[He waits a couple of days before contacting her, only so he can be sure the pollen's effects have died down. But he's not going to wait a minute longer once he believes she'll be safe with him. Can't risk having her find out from someone else.]

Airy, love — there's a new sort of situation we need to talk about.

It's nothin' to do with us. I mean — I haven't — it's not about the rules. Just establishin' that before I get into it.

But. I hurt someone.

It was an accident. And I wanted 'ya to know from me, before you heard about it from anywhere else. We can talk about it like this, or the next time we meet up, but... [A sigh.] ...right, I'm gonna stop ramblin' before it gets away from me.

I'll see 'ya later.

Audio | April 17th

[imaginationswoes]

[Airy sits up a little straighter when she hears Cassidy's voice echo over her tome. Her teeth nimble on her lower lip before she clamors towards the book. It's probably a good thing that he can't see her since her motions result in a ridiculous flail of her arms.

She keeps it on audio though she's tempted to change the crystal to video. He sounds upset.]

Cassidy. [Her voice is breathless and filled with worry.] Where are you?

[Airy doesn't think that something like this should wait until later and she doesn't want to have this conversation over the tomes. She wants to hold him.]

[riotousjunkie]

You wanna meet up now?

[That's... that's fine. Rip it off like a bandaid, right? Still, he wasn't expecting that.]

— yeah, sure. I'm in me room.

[imaginationswoes]

Yeah.

[This doesn't feel like the kind of thing that should be left simmering and Airy's already made up her mind about the matter. It's something you end up thinking about when you date a vampire, time isn't going to change it.]

I'll be right there. Um... I'll knock.

[She pauses.]

Going now.

[Airy raises from her bed, walks to the door, remembers that she hadn't ended the conversation and turns back to turn off the book. She'll never get used to treating the tomes like phones. She then turns on her heels and runs to Cassidy's room. She knows the path like the back of her hand and arrives relatively quickly. She's barefoot and in one of the three dresses that she owns.

She knocks at the door.]

Cassidy?

[Her voice is soft, like a whisper and suddenly uncertain. Does he want to see her? She rushed over without thinking... maybe he doesn't but he told her because of the whole secrets thing last time...]

[riotousjunkie]

It's open.

[He's sat down in the desk chair. Barefoot himself, otherwise freshly dressed in jeans and a t-shirt. He'd taken a shower before calling her, to make extra-double-sure his head was clear.

He doesn't say anything at first, when she enters. Only looks up to study her expression and the way she approaches.]

[imaginationswoes]

[Airy steps inside and pauses when she spots Cassidy sitting near his desk. She hesitates for only a second, before she purposefully walks over to him and throws her arms around his shoulders.

She holds him in a tight hug, burying her face in his neck while her legs drape across his lap.]

Are you okay? [Airy breathes worry into the words as she clings to him.] Before anything else, I want to make sure you're okay. [She wants to know details but she also doesn't want to pressure him. Airy knows Cassidy and if he hurt someone then he's most likely already beating himself up about it. She doesn't want him to feel the kind of pain that comes with taking an innocent life.]

[riotousjunkie]

[He doesn't really feel it until she's already holding him. It comes along with registering the weight of her in his lap, the feeling of her as he puts his arms around her in turn — carefully. He can smell her skin, and he doesn't want to bite her. Not even a little.

It's relief. He knows for sure, now, that he's back in control.]

M'all right now. Better than I was a day ago. [He shuts his eyes, taking a second to just feel her there.] Loads better, now.

[imaginationswoes]

[She holds him a little tighter, headless of the danger.

Airy isn't afraid of him. Cassidy can be scary but, technically speaking, everyone can be scary. She trusts him and she wants to protect him; even if that means protecting him from himself.

She loosens her hug enough to sit up and meet his gaze. Her fingers brush along his hair line as she inspects his features.]

I know you Cassidy. I know that you're not okay with hurting people. I want to know what happened but I want to make sure that you're really okay first.

You don't have to be alone.

[riotousjunkie]

You're really not mad...?

[He's skeptical and hopeful at the same time, and wondering how forgiving she'll be when she hears the whole story. In any case, this wasn't the reaction he was expecting to 'I hurt someone.']

[imaginationswoes]

[In this regard, Airy is a little weird.

She meets Cassidy with a steady gaze and shakes her head.] I'm not. [And she means it.]

Cassidy, I know what you are. You're a vampire and you need blood to live. That makes you different and dangerous. [He isn't as dangerous to her since her blood will most likely burn him but it's a general statement that went hand-in-hand with most vampires.] You wouldn't hurt someone on purpose unless they deserved it. You're a good person and you have to deal with having desires that other people don't.

[Airy exhales a short breath.]

If this place has taught me anything it's that desires can be hard to control and are sometimes not your fault. [Her fingers brush against his hair, playing with the short stems as she spoke.] I'm not happy about it. I don't like people getting hurt but I'm not angry at you and I don't blame you.

I love you Cassidy. All of you.

[riotousjunkie]

[You need blood to live. Cassidy doesn't say anything, but his expression tightens like he wants to deny that.

The needing blood part. Not the 'different and dangerous' part. Or the bit about desires.]

I love you, too.

[He leans his forehead against hers and rests there a moment. He doesn't have to pretend to be totally all right. Not with her.]

Over half a century since I bit into a person who wasn't askin' for it. If it were a bloody twelve-step program, I'd've earned a fifty-year chip.

At least he's not dead. Though it'll make chance encounters in the dining hall a bit awkward from now on.

[imaginationswoes]

[Airy keeps her arms loosely wrapped around Cassidy's neck. She's ready to be his strength and be here for him whenever he needs someone. She knows how difficult it is when you feel completely alone.

Her fingers gently play with the short strands of hair at the back of his neck.]

That's pretty amazing.

[The vampires from her world have to live off of human blood.]

If that ever happens just come and get me. I'll keep you safe from all of the awkward. Or I'll make it so awkward that everyone just starts laughing. [Airy has a talent for awkward.

She pauses, exhaling and inhaling a few slow breaths before speaking again.]

Are you okay to talk about it? [Airy doesn't know who he bit.]

[riotousjunkie]

...if you were thinkin' about invitin' He Ming to any more threesomes, you might wanna reconsider.

[And he should probably stop using such flippant phrasing, but that's how he copes. Cassidy rubs the heel of one hand across his eyes.]

D'you know there's pollens that make you wanna do shite other than just sleepin' with people? Someone ought to write a bloody pamphlet.

We were out for a walk in the Wilds, and I got hit with somethin' harsh. You know I do me best not to get carried away with anger — this was like, all of a sudden I was the bloody Hulk, minus the purple trousers. I didn't want nothin' else but to hurt him.

[He can't look her in the eye anymore. His fingertips tighten slightly against her skin, like he isn't sure he should be touching her while describing this.]

Maybe it wouldn't'a been so bad if I wasn't a vampire.

[imaginationswoes]

[Airy continues to gently run her fingers through his hair. She doesn't know if the movement helps but he hadn't swatted her away yet.]

He Ming? [She sounds a little surprised. She doesn't know him very well but she knows that he's rather relaxed and easy going. Death here isn't permanent so maybe... maybe he'll be okay. Maybe... Airy's never died before so she doesn't know.] It'll be okay.

We'll find someone else for our threesome.

[That might not be helpful...]

I heard. I was talking to Eve about it. That doesn't sound like it's your fault Cassidy. [She reaches for him again, wrapping her arms around his shoulders.] I can't say one way or the other. [Her voice is very soft, her head pressed against the curve of his neck.] I'll love you if you're a vampire or not but... I don't think that's something you can change. If you want too... then I think you should do whatever makes you happy.

Your happiness means the most to me.

[riotousjunkie]

[He folds himself against her in turn, letting his arms curl around her and his head tilt to lean against hers. It feels safe, holding her.

His eyes lower to the back of his hand. He watches the moth's wings flutter, a few times.]

Can't change it. [He hadn't even been thinking about it in those terms. It was impossible.]

You know, I generally do kill people when I bite 'em. [Is that one of those things they haven't talked about yet? Another one of those things? It ought to be established.] It's not clean. It's a bloody mess. I tear into 'em with my teeth, and I leave this jagged rip...

[And yes, he's fully aware that he's saying all this with his mouth very close to her neck. That's part of the point. She has to properly understand what he's done.]

...it's not a pretty sight.

[imaginationswoes]

[Airy holds Cassidy close and has to silently remind herself to keep her breathing steady. It pains her to see him like this but it doesn't feel like there is anything that she can do to help him.]

I didn't know that.

[Her voice whispers against his neck and, while it is scary, she doesn't pull away.]

Is that why you don't drink from people at all? [Airy realizes that it's a stupid question.] You don't have to answer that. [She exhales a slow breath, groping to find something to say to him.] You can't change it but maybe there are ways to help.

[A beat.]

Maybe I can help.

[riotousjunkie]

[Cassidy sighs. She's so warm, and she smells of comfort, which might be an odd thing to think, but it's there all the same. And she still isn't letting him go.]

I don't think you can. Least... I think this is somethin' I have to handle on me own.

[This isn't how he expected this to go at all. Even if she'd known to anticipate this at some point, he would have thought the reality of it would leave her horrified.]

I don't know what sort of additional trouble might come of it. If anythin'. What sort of consequences...

[He folds his arms a little closer around her.]

Havin' you here, though... you not runnin' for the hills. That does help somewhat.

[imaginationswoes]

I'll always be here for you Cass.

[She pushes herself up a bit so she can met Cassidy's gaze. Airy isn't happy about the situation or what Cassidy has done and she's worried about He Ming but she's more worried about Cassidy and the guilt he must be feeling.]

Funny think about love. It makes stuff like this easy for me. I won't lie to you. Sometimes you scare me but I think that's okay. Even when people aren't vampires they're scary.

[Airy runs her fingers affectionately through his hair before pressing a light kiss against his cheek.] And if there is anything I can ever you do, you just have to ask. I'll come running. You don't have to carry this alone.

[riotousjunkie]

You're a bloody marvel, Airy Miller.

[He very nearly says something about not deserving her, but he's had enough self-pitying for one week, thank you very much, and if she chooses to be with him anyway, who is he to argue?

So instead, he leans forward and places a soft, tender kiss on her lips.]

[imaginationswoes]

[Airy exhales a slow happy breath as she meets Cassidy's gaze.]

I don't know about that.

[Her words are soft, whispered just as Cassidy's mouth presses against her own. Her thoughts slip away and she falls into the comfort and warmth of his kiss. She'd wrap Cassidy in warmth and light if she could, starting with this single kiss.]

[riotousjunkie]

[He feels that desire from her. It's so easy to believe he could be a good person when he's with her, and it warms him. It's like standing in the sun, only... nice.

His heartbeat flutters in his chest as he breaks the kiss far enough to speak.]

Have you got anywhere to be in the next hour?

[His hand is already resting on her knee.]

[imaginationswoes]

[Airy smiles against his mouth.]

Just right here, with you.

[She tries not to make plans and, even if she'd had something else to do, she would have shifted around her schedule to stayed with Cassidy. This is one of those moments that she considers important.]

[riotousjunkie]

[He restarts the kiss deeper, lets his hand slide along her leg until his fingers push under the hem of her skirt, then further still.

He doesn't want to hurt her. He has hurt her, in different ways than how he hurt He Ming, because he was being an idiot. He wants to believe that he'll never hurt her that way again. Right now, it feels as if he believes it hard enough, it might be true.]

[imaginationswoes]

[A soft affectionate moans slips from Airy's lips as their kiss deepens. Her arms wrap around his shoulders while her fingers run through the short prickles of his dark hair. Her mouth parts and she breaths him in while shifting her hips to settle more comfortably on his lap while giving his hand further access to the pale flesh of her thighs.

Her motions are slow, as if carefully measured, but warm and accepting. She doesn't think that he needs anything quick and needy but a softer touch of someone who truly loves him.

That much, she can give him.]

[riotousjunkie]

[She settles closer into his lap, and he's starting to get hard inside his jeans, but she's right — he isn't in a hurry. He just allows himself to enjoy the feeling of her weight shifting, and eases her skirt a little higher toward her hips.

His other hand raises to her neck, massaging at the side of it, his thumb grazing down the line of her throat.]